I can't do this anymore

Spider17

All A-10 player
My first impression of the University was watching a team in the NCAA tournament in 2011 make a memorable run to the sweet 16. Little did I know that a few years later I would call Richmond home and the rest was history. I fell in love and became indebted to a University that had given me so much in my life both personally and professionally. As a sports fan all my life, Richmond basketball quickly became the #1 team I supported in all sports: whether it was collegiate or professional, domestic or international. I had been asked by my friends before why do I care so much about Richmond sports. My response was always the same. "I care about the things I love".

Over this time watching my beloved Spiders I have felt joy, sadness, anger, disgust, and every emotion in between. Seeing JOC's tweet last night, I felt something for the first time -- heartbroken. It wasn't because I wasn't expecting Mooney to not come back. I think we all knew this was going to happen. It was the manner it occurred that stuck with me in a way where I felt this response. No press release. No explanation why. No setting the tone for expectations next year. It didn't even come directly from our leadership. Instead, a simple tweet from JOC on a Friday night during the women's basketball game saying he is returning for the 22nd year. Even the picture used by JOC I found fitting. What appears to be a sarcastic smile, almost symbolic that he knows that he has utter immunity here for life. Our administration didn't even wait until the season was officially over to make the announcement. Sending it now just signified what we knew all along. That the results do not matter. The reactions from VCU and non-spider fans was telling and says all you need to know.

I wanted to sleep on it, so I didn't feel I was overreacting, but after some reflection, I just don't know if I can do this anymore and be a fan of the team. I don't know if I can muster up the energy to try and convince myself that recruits we get in the offseason are going to be great. I don't know if I can pretend to be optimistic about how the out of conference schedule will turn out. I don't know if I can watch the games knowing that whether we win or lose, none of it matters. There is no vision, direction, goals, or expectations of this program. We are content with being on a boat floating in the middle of the ocean.

I have been a member of these forums since 2015. I think about all the posters who have come and gone over the years who probably were fed up. As frustrated as I was, I never thought that it would be me. However, after all these years, the university I have given my unconditional love and loyalty to has officially broken my spirit as a fan. Something I never thought I would say. I've come to this realization because it's hard for me to care about something that I know deep down, doesn't care back.

Godspeed to you my friends. I have enjoyed this community we've built here very much that has withstood a lot over the years and even revitalized by a new board. Though we've never met in person, I've enjoyed the camaraderie and discourse with all of you over the years. I took a hiatus a few years ago due to being frustrated with the state of our program and came back with more of a positive outlook. I think I need to do it again. Don't worry though, I'll come back at some point.
 
17 - you do what you think you need to do.

IMO this online community is not the issue although there were some absolutely brutal losses that caused me to dread even looking at the forum. My solution was to direct my main focus into other sports where the school is getting the job done.

Not particularly interested in WBB? Roussell can change your mind. MLAX? Chemotti can change your mind. A few years ago I had never seen a WLAX match. Kwolek and Harrington got me interested.

It’s hard giving up something you’ve emotionally invested in. But I’ve managed to get over (mostly) the disaster that is Richmond MBB by following and supporting teams that have earned that support. Make a last minute decision and head over to Henrico at 1:30 if you can. I’ll be there to watch some really good basketball.
 
I don’t want u to bail on board I don’t think anyone wants to see that of virtually any poster.

I’m sorry if this comes off as insensitive but what did u really expect when u supported that 2-year extension in 24’. Same goes for vt4700. To put him out 5 years when we had just gone thru the 10 contract burden was insanity. Very predictable 2 years later to end up here.
 
Next 17 will develop a nervous tic. Then foaming at the mouth. Sometimes you whimper at night. When watching games at home on TV, fans are inclined to cover their heads with paper bags. Don't worry next season will be upon us. Rinse and repeat.
 
Matt Smith is not as pro-Mooney as he used to be. Bob Black is another story and is part of the problem.
Honestly, Bob has been critical of some things on his radio show lately. The other day he said he thinks that the program needs to become much more modern. He's said some other things recently that almost have made me wonder whether he knows a change is coming.

Of course yesterday's announcement makes me feel like that's not happening, but who knows.
 
I've noted this too. There's been a slow change in tone and just some random out-of-the-blue comments that make you go hmmm...
Interesting. Don’t have to drive to/from work every day so don’t always have a radio on during his show. If he is making comments they must be much more subtle. I have definitely heard unquestionable criticism from others like Matt B on ESPN but not Bob. It is a good thing to look at a glass half full, but another to act like a half full glass is overflowing.
 
Ok I’m back.


Maybe I was being a little dramatic yesterday 🤣 . I will say that I was at my lowest point as a Spider fan and yet, whenever we hit rock bottom there all seems to be a lower level we can go. I watched the last 2 minutes of this historic game (for all the wrong reasons) and was venting to my wife and she asked why I don’t post on the forums. I told her I was on a hiatus but then she told me it wasn’t going to last because she knows how much I post on here, and she was right. I realized a few things.

1. Venting to my wife about Spider sports probably isn’t the best thing for our marriage
2. I enjoy the discourse here too much
3. I realized no matter how much this program breaks my spirit, they can always find ways to break it even more and the fact that it bothers me, mean I will always care. Whether I like it or not, there will always be at least a little part of me that still wants to hope and believe we will eventually turn things around.
4. Having complete and utter apathy where we’ve all given up and resigned ourself to a state of emotional numbness is probably what our administration wants from our fanbase. Because of that, I think it’s important that I do my part as a fan to at least have some passion when no one in our administration will.
 
Ok I’m back.


Maybe I was being a little dramatic yesterday 🤣 . I will say that I was at my lowest point as a Spider fan and yet, whenever we hit rock bottom there all seems to be a lower level we can go. I watched the last 2 minutes of this historic game (for all the wrong reasons) and was venting to my wife and she asked why I don’t post on the forums. I told her I was on a hiatus but then she told me it wasn’t going to last because she knows how much I post on here, and she was right. I realized a few things.

1. Venting to my wife about Spider sports probably isn’t the best thing for our marriage
2. I enjoy the discourse here too much
3. I realized no matter how much this program breaks my spirit, they can always find ways to break it even more and the fact that it bothers me, mean I will always care. Whether I like it or not, there will always be at least a little part of me that still wants to hope and believe we will eventually turn things around.
4. Having complete and utter apathy where we’ve all given up and resigned ourself to a state of emotional numbness is probably what our administration wants from our fanbase. Because of that, I think it’s important that I do my part as a fan to at least have some passion when no one in our administration will.
Congratulations, you have become a long suffering Spiders' fan. Welcome to the club. By the way, our spouses have more perspective. After a while, they understand our condition with a little mirth.
 
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